Having gathered my last strength, I decided to go to church, figuring it’s no problem if I died: I’m in a monastery, and they can serve my funeral here. I wanted to go to one last service. And in this joyless state I headed for church. When the anointing began, I was barely able to venerate the icon of the Equal-to-the-Apostles Nina, after which the abbot of the monastery Schema-Igumen Agafon (Chesnokov) anointed me with oil.
A man came to him and said, “Father, life is hard. Bless me to hang myself.” Fr. Anatoly listened to him, heard him out, and explained to him that taking one’s own life by suicide is a terrible sin, and that human life is a priceless gift of God. But the man would not hear it, and continued trying to bend the priest’s will to give a blessing for suicide.