On Remembrance of Wrongs (Resentment)
The holy virtues are like Jacob’s ladder; while the base passions are like the chains that fell from the great Apostle Peter. Virtues, being linked one with another, raise the willing soul up to heaven; whereas the passions, giving birth to one another and strengthening one another, cast a person down into the abyss.
And since we have heard that remembrance of wrongs is one of the natural offspring of senseless anger, let us now speak of it in order.
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Remembrance of wrongs is the completion of anger; the keeping of sins in memory; hatred of righteousness; the destruction of virtues; the rust of the soul; the worm of the mind; the shame of prayer; the cutting off of supplication; estrangement from love; a nail driven into the soul; a bitter feeling which is perversely cherished; an unceasing sin; a wakeful transgression; a constant malice.
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This dark and loathsome passion—remembrance of wrongs—is one of those passions that are born, and do not give birth (or sometimes do give birth). We will not speak of it at great length.
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He who has ceased from anger has slain remembrance of wrongs; for as long as the father lives, so long does he beget.
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He who has acquired love has banished enmity; but he who harbors enmity stores up for himself needless labors.
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A table of love destroys hatred, and sincere gifts soften the soul. But a table without vigilance becomes the mother of boldness, and through the window of love, gluttony leaps in.
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I have seen hatred dissolve long-standing bonds of sinful love; and afterward, remembrance of wrongs strangely prevented their reunion. A wondrous sight! One demon heals another—but perhaps this is not the work of demons, but of Divine Providence.
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Remembrance of wrongs is far from firm and natural love, but fornication easily draws near to it—just as we sometimes see lice hiding among doves.
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If you must remember, then remember your enmity against the demons; and if you must wage war, then wage it unceasingly against your own flesh. For this flesh is an ungrateful and deceitful friend—the more we indulge it, the more it harms us.
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Remembrance of wrongs is a wicked interpreter of Scripture, twisting the words of the Spirit according to its own understanding. Let it be put to shame by the prayer given to us by Jesus—the prayer we cannot utter sincerely if we harbor resentment.
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If, after much struggle, you are unable to uproot this thorn, then at least repent and humble yourself in words before the one against whom you bear malice. In this way, being ashamed of your long-standing hypocrisy, you may come to love him sincerely, your conscience burning like fire.
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You will not know that you are completely healed of this corruption when you pray for one who has offended you, or repay evil with gifts, or invite him to your table, but rather when, hearing that he has fallen into some misfortune, whether of soul or body, you grieve for him as for yourself and weep.
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A resentful recluse is like an asp hiding in its hole, carrying within itself deadly poison.
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The remembrance of Jesus’s sufferings will heal resentment, for it is greatly shamed by His meekness. A worm is born in wood that is rotten within; and in those who appear meek and silent, yet are not truly so, there lurks a hidden and enduring anger. He who casts anger out of himself receives forgiveness of sins; but he who clings to it is deprived of God’s mercy.
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Some have taken upon themselves labors and ascetic struggles to obtain forgiveness; but the one who does not remember wrongs has surpassed them. Forgive, and ye shall be forgiven… give, and it shall be given unto you (Luke 6:37–38).
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Freedom from resentment is a sign of true repentance; but he who harbors resentment in his heart and thinks he repents is like a man who dreams he is running.
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I have seen those infected with resentment exhort others to forget injuries—and then, ashamed by their own words, they abandoned their passion.
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Let no one think that this dark passion is insignificant; for it often steals even into spiritual men.
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Step nine. He who has ascended to it with boldness should ask the Savior Jesus for the forgiveness of his sins.
From: Readings For Every Day of Great Lent, Ed. N. Shaposhnikova (Moscow: Danilov Monastery, 2025).